SCARFIES

If “Teaching Mrs. Tingle” had captured one-tenth the nerve twisting suspense, horror, and humor of SCARFIES, then you wouldn't be thinking “Huh? Teaching Mrs…who?” right now. Meet Emma, Scott, Alex, Nicole, and Graham, five “scarfies” ? undergrads at Otago University in Dunedin, New Zealand. They think they've lucked out when they locate an abandoned off-campus house, filthy but intact, and with the electricity still miraculously running. Free utilities, free rent, no owner in sight ? the perfect pad for raucous parties and sex on a starving-student budget. Then the squatters make an awe-inspiring discovery, behind a heavy, bolted door in the cellar. It turns out that the old house is not as abandoned as they'd thought, and an enraged criminal has returned to claim his stash. The young people manage to trap the nameless intruder who wails and thrashes like a maddened beast. Calling the police is not an option; the scarfies are in it just as deep as their captive. What do you do when you've got a monster cornered in the basement? An unpredictable, furious, cunning monster? And what do you do if you find the same monster hiding in yourself? We recommend you visit the bathroom before viewing SCARFIES; you will not be able to budge from your seat during the last 50 minutes. (?So true!? ? DWW.)